A Horrible Way to Die

A girl goes to AA meetings or some kind of therapy for her alcoholism. The movies jumps back and forth between the past and the present, showing her relationship with a psychopath serial killer as she embarks on a new relationship with a new guy.

Best Death:

I have no clue.

Here’s the thing about me and horror movies. I have seen a lot of horror movies and sat through quite a few bad ones. I could not make it through this one. I picked it out of a Redbox based on the cover alone, popped it in the 360 and sat back with the BF and the best friend. After 20 minutes, I went back to reading my magazine. After 30 minutes, the best friend took a shower and after 35 minutes, the BF finally turned it off. I’ve made him sit through some bad movies too and even he couldn’t handle this one.

Sorority Row

A group of sorority sisters decide to get back on a cheating boyfriend, even though the girl he cheated on previously cheated on him. Got that? The slutty sister Megan cheated on her boyfriend Garrett, but then he cheated on her and all hell breaks loose. They give him fake drugs, he drugs Megan and she “dies”.

They sneak her out to an abandoned mine and make him think they need to dismember her body and leave no trace of her behind. While the other girls wander off, Garrett goes batshit crazy and actually hacks her to death with a sharp rock. The gang decides to hide her body and go on with their lives.

Sadly only one girl, Cassidy, actually feels any remorse for what happened. She moves out, stops going to sorority functions and basically just wants her life back. At graduation, Cassidy tries ignoring the girls, but they push her into attending one last party at the house.

Naturally a random killer turns up and starts offing the girls. Lots of suspects abound, including the guy that killed Megan and her little sister.

Best Death:

It’s a tie between the first two deaths. One involves an annoying reality star cut apart by a sharp rock. The other death involves a slutty chick getting a wine bottle shoved down her throat.

Sorority Row gets a lot of flack for shitty acting, a bad premise and a lot of other complaints. Personally though, I actually like it. You do get stuck with a lot of boring characters and stereotypes, but they eventually die…or at least most of them.