Wednesday, September 26, 2012

“Croc” Movie Review

Release Date: November 4, 2007
Runtime: 86 minutes
Directed by: Stewart Rafill
Rating: NR

Oh god, not another one of these. I’m not going to bother listing the actors’ names because trust me, you’ve never seen them in anything before. Jake McQuade lives in Thailand with his sister Allison and her son Theo, running a small zoo. A woman named Evelyn shows up to do a routine inspection, and Jake flips out because some random guy wants to shut down his zoo. Basically, the guy wants to open a resort and he hired people to lay down a road in two weeks. I guess they don’t worry about who actually owns the land because the road runs right through the middle of Jake’s farm.

People start showing up dead, and the locals realize that it’s a crocodile. Even though a witness saw a big ass croc attacking, they refuse to believe her and decide that it must be one of Jake’s. Some local guys break in and release his crocodiles, but he manages to track them down and save them. Ah yes, and we have poor Michael Madsen (“The Killing Jar,” etc.) showing up as Hawkins, a guy who started tracking the killer croc years ago.

How can a movie about a killer crocodile be so bad? I’m actually a fan of killer animal films, and I actually like some of the RHI Entertainment movies, but this one is just bad. My roommate walked downstairs and he loves horror movies, but he couldn’t sit through more than 15 minutes of it. Sadly for me, I sat through the whole thing.

This is one of those films that uses archival footage for most of the creature scenes. If the acting is strong enough, I can overlook that and get into the movie. The actors here look like they studied straight out of the “how to be bad” playbook.

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