Monday, March 10, 2014

The Fog – What kind of fog moves against the wind?

Runtime: 100 minutes
Release Date: October 14, 2005
Rating: PG-13
Director: Rupert Wainwright

In 1871, William Blake desperately needed a new home for his people, all of whom were lepers, including his beautiful and much younger wife Elizabeth. After meeting some people living on an island off the coast of Oregon, he agreed to buy half their land and move his people there. The people then showed up, stole all of his money, and set his boat on fire, leaving him and his family and friends to die. Blake then cursed the people who killed him.

Nearly one hundred years later, the residents of the island prepare for the upcoming anniversary with a new statue devoted to its founders, the same people who killed the boat. Nick and his friends accidentally disrupt some artifacts while on their boat, which leads the ghosts of the murdered to come back to life.

This problem doesn't phase him given that his ex-girlfriend Elizabeth recently arrived back in town. Elizabeth receives a pocket watch from a creepy guy not long after arriving, and when she looks at the watch, she notices that weird things start happening. Nick also has to deal with Stevie, the radio show host he recently had a fling with, even though he supposedly remains devoted to his ex. After a mysterious fog descends over the town, everyone needs to come together to survive the night.

Pro tip: Do not watch The Fog remake with someone who is a big fan of the original. Not only do I think this movie is okay, but I actually own a copy. Unfortunately, that copy is somehow lost, so I decided to give it a go on Netflix one night. That led to my roommate sitting down next to me and constantly pointing out how things happened in the original while making it clear that the original is much better.

Confession time: I have only seen the original version of The Fog once and I pretty much don't remember anything about it. Ask me about this movie, and I can tell you character names, plot points, and other random facts.

The best and worst thing about this movie is the acting. Selma Blair is perfect as Stevie, and I actually just read that she was the original choice for the role but almost lost out on it. She does a good job of portraying a single mother and strong woman, though I do have a hard time believing that she would have a one night stand with someone like Tom Welling.

Speaking of Welling, did he even bother acting in this flick? It plays like some random universe where Clark Kent accidentally landed on a random island instead of Smallville. It probably doesn't help that he has absolutely no chemistry with Maggie Grace. Grace plays Elizabeth just like she does every role in her career, from the vapid and annoying chick on Lost to the vapid and annoying daughter in the Taken films. It's hard to believe that one man would fall in love with the character let alone two.

Though I liked The Fog the first few times I saw it, the last time was not the charm. I finally saw why the movie got such bad reviews when it first came out and why so many people still like it today. It's just a fairly forgettable horror flick that came out during the mass produced PG-13 horror movie days.

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