Friday, March 14, 2014

The Millennium Bug – Oh no, it's a giant bug!

Runtime: 88 minutes
Release Date: June 3, 2011
Rating: NR
Director: Kenneth Cran

Recently married Byron Haskin makes the mistake of taking his teenage daughter Clarissa with him on his honeymoon with his new wife Joany. Byron talks about the millennium and how he's so glad that his family can escape all those troubles. He also lets us know that he's taking them to an abandoned town where no one has lived for years.

Just in case we wondered if the town really is empty, we get a scene involving a ground of inbred hicks living not too far away. After a blond woman gives birth, the papa of the clan realizes that the baby is another mutant and orders his son/nephew/cousin/brother to take it outside and kill it. As we hear a shotgun, the mama of the clan points out that they need some fresh blood if they want to stop having mutant babies.

Cue the Haskin family arriving and setting up camp for the night. The mutants kidnap Clarissa and Joany and take them back to their cabin in the woods. At the same time, a crazy looking guy appears and starts rambling about a giant millennium bug living in the woods. It turns out that it's a random bug that only appears once every millennium. Just as the rednecks start taking control over their new women, the bug decides to finally make its appearance.

The Millennium Bug is an awesomely bad movie. It's the kind of movie that you watch with your friends and have a good time just laughing at all the characters and people. The "inbred rednecks" are pretty much just normal looking people in dirty clothes. If the movie didn't make a point of constantly pointing out that they were hicks or inbred, I probably would think they were just a family living in the woods.

When we first started watching it, we were wondering what was up with the plotline. Despite coming out in 2011, the movie is set in 1999/2000, and it almost seems like the screenwriters and director decided to just sit on the script for awhile. That actually makes sense because we're far enough away now that we can laugh about how scared everyone was at the time. You can't help but laugh when the characters mention things like the computers all going haywire and people rioting in the streets.

The movie made a splash because it uses real and practical effects in lieu of CGI and computer effects. A lot of people apparently hated that, but I have to be honest, I didn't even notice when I was watching it. There is so much bad CGI out there that I just assumed this was another one.

The Millennium Bug is far from everyone's cup of tea, but I found it pretty funny and entertaining. Not funny and entertaining enough to make me sit down and watch it again, but good enough that I didn't mind wasting a few hours on a winter night.

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